Oh the Challenges

My child is currently entering her 13th hour of sleep so I thought I'd try to get something written quick.

I've been thinking about these past few months and all the challenges of parenthood and of life.

It started at about 35 weeks pregnant.  My blood pressure started going up and my body started to swell.  Each week it nudged up a little higher.  Then at 37 weeks I went into the hospital to be monitored over night for preaclampsia and HELLP syndrome.  I'd never been in a hospital before and I can't say the experience was enjoyable.  But my blood pressure went down and so did the swelling.  Off to bed rest for the next 3 weeks. But as a posted before my body didn't cooperate and I ended up having to be induced and then sectioned.  I think I handled all the unexpected pretty well.  There were days I sobbed and asked "Why Me?" and some days now I get angry that I didn't get to experience birth the way I wanted but I have hope some day I will. 

Then while I was home on bed rest I found out that my school was not going to renew my contract and I would not have a job for the following school year.  Talk about stress on top of stress.  But I still tried to stay positive and I kept telling myself "Maybe this is God's way of telling me I should stay home with my baby."  I applied everywhere but no luck.  I'm lucky that I am a teacher and I can sub and at least make money for my family without filling out more job applications and doing interviews.  It's going to be a very hard year for our family.  We're really going to have to give up a lot of eating out, buying on impulse and try to make it work.  Thank God I have this beautiful little girl to cheer me up every day and I'll give up everything to make sure she's happy.

Of course things happen in 3's.  Brynn was almost one month old and I was on my way to a La Leche League meeting and I got in a car accident and totaled my car.  We were both ok. . she actually never even woke up.  We were shopping around for a new car at the time and were going to keep my and trade my husbands.  Isn't there some sort of saying about "When you make a plan God laughs"??  So for two weeks I had to depend on my husband to drive me around (his car is a manual and I never learned!). 

Maybe I'm in denial, maybe I just handle stress well, maybe I really truly believe everything will be alright but right now with all the crap we've had to deal with I'm happy.  Being a parent has truly fulfilled my life and I'm starting to think this is really what I was meant to do in this life.

Baby woke up. . .  stay tuned for Oh the Challenges PART II